Friends before sex? What do you all think?
bashfullyblonde (this topic's creator)10/21/2007 4:49:22 PM
Member since 5/31/2006
( new topic )
tck_beachbum 10/21/2007 5:35:30 PM
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Sex before friends.....? What do you think?
Githyanki 10/26/2007 4:37:01 PM
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Member since 10/4/2007 4:01:42 PM
In my biased opinion:
I have either been semi-raped on the first date or not at all, never, "but honey I never thought of you that way. You are such a good friend to me, and I don't want to spoil it" Yadda Yadda heard it all before, and why do I persist in saying No when it is offered on a platter on the first night????? Just doesn't work in real life. But I digress. Hello bashfullyblonde.
So yeah, in a very long winded way I am with tck on that one (Damn, agreeing with a self confessed beachbum!)
ScarlettButler 11/4/2007 10:34:26 PM
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Definately FRIENDs before SEX.. that would be my motto.. its just me ..
Twice_baked_taders 11/6/2007 1:15:01 AM
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If all your looking for is sex, who cares?
Personally, I can't have sex with a friend. To risky-messy. To f'n weird.
I can have sex with someone I love.
stinkeasereturn 11/8/2007 2:16:21 PM
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It's hard for me to f.uck someone I respect. I guess that's why I'm not gay.
Vontoria4 11/11/2007 1:02:54 PM
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very interesting perspective from the guys... I'm going to think most women would say friends before sex because its a self respect thing (in my opinion).. its interesting to me that some guys are saying they can't/wont have sex with a friend or someone they respect... Most meaningful relationships start as friends first before dating and all that and if you are in a relationship with someone i really hope its someone you respect... just my thoughts on the subject lol
NICEnEVIL 11/11/2007 3:22:32 PM
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I'd rather have sex... I have lots of friends already...
tck_beachbum 11/11/2007 4:00:57 PM
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Nice... we've never met... we're NOT friends.
Come here.
stinkeasereturn 11/12/2007 2:38:21 PM
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I don't know, when I look down and a girl has a mouth full of my jizz, it's hard not to laugh.
Singletaryzero 11/13/2007 2:38:25 PM
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LOL NICEANDEVIL .. I see the ole girls are whores and guys are studs is still alive and well ... Interesting how somethings never evolve .. Lets face it if chemistry isnt there ..there isnt going to be any sex , friend first or not lol
Hunter_Rep 11/14/2007 9:55:02 PM
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oh crap, i think we got a new age yuppy on our hands
steely689 11/16/2007 12:47:15 PM
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singletary, you got that right. both sexes.
let's make the ladies STUDETTS and the men we'll just call them SLUTTERS
steely689 11/16/2007 12:52:22 PM
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The one thing which always holds true is assholes come in both sexes, they are not gender specific!
stinkeasereturn 11/16/2007 2:38:48 PM
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Obviously^!
Hunter_Rep 11/17/2007 12:26:42 AM
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i think he is callin me an asshole stink, i have never been complimented like that in a long time.
stinkeasereturn 11/17/2007 4:41:48 PM
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Yeah, haha.
tck_beachbum 11/17/2007 4:54:23 PM
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I thought he meant that he goes both ways, you know, like he knows where he can screw either sex?
Hunter_Rep 11/17/2007 8:04:08 PM
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ahh yes tck, you mean tri sexuall
TOXXXIC 11/17/2007 9:48:24 PM
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the whole key is to remain friends AFTER sex
Vontoria4 11/17/2007 9:56:26 PM
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Toxxxic has anyone ever told you, you look like the guy from "house"
lol sorry i had to say it... you could be twins lol
Ron_092 11/18/2007 12:32:52 AM
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My best friend is a woman and I love her madly. Would I have sex with her? In a freakin' heartbeat. But I know where the line is, and I'll never step over that line unless I know that it is where she wants me. Its about respect. . . you can't love someone who you don't respect.
Vontoria4 11/18/2007 12:34:20 AM
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very well put ron
steely689 11/18/2007 1:03:13 AM
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Over the years several friends of mine have outright asked me if we could have sex, I always said YES! What are friends for. It can be a tricky situation and you may never go there again, so what. Good friends are hard to come by. Those with benefits even harder. I just think if you are mature enough to still act comfortable about it and not make it out to be more than what it is, it all good. If in doubt, talk about it.
Twice_baked_taders 11/19/2007 11:03:25 PM
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Everybody's different. I'm an all or nothing guy. I take sex one of 2 ways. Impersonal or extremely personal. There is no in between for me. Black and white...no one gets hurt. If you want to be my friend and have sex you better be ready to commit. Wishy washy relationship crapola never flew with me. Never had the patience for the melodrama and a stiff dick is no compensation. To put up with melodrama yah got to have my heart.
I ain't cheap and I don't come easy.
Githyanki 11/20/2007 5:43:52 AM
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"ahh yes tck, you mean tri sexuall"
Indeed. As in Try anything. And Try and Try and not get any.<g>
Back on topic: Being friends first can enhance the experience, but it can really mess up a friendship. Well, I guess as with anything relationship it is the two people concerned who make the rules, in the end.
1NewYorkCharmingGal 11/20/2007 5:59:44 AM
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JMO If I cannot be friends with him first then there cannot be sex. That is how I feel!!!
mostie_again 12/7/2007 7:39:28 AM
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I can't hardly imagine having sex with a male friend- I guess maybe I just have 'categories', as it were- there are men that you are friends with, hang out with, buddies with, and then there are men that you have a romantic relationship with- it would be difficult to mix the two together, although the one you have the romantic relationship with can be your best friend in the world (this is how it is for me, at least), I don't think I would want to go the 'friends for quite a while before we do the wild thing' route- but then...that's just me-
Besides...wouldn't that be one of those 'friends with benefits' thingies? lol
mostie_again 12/7/2007 7:42:49 AM
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And while I'm on the subject, I have something else to add to that- have you ever noticed that a lot of times, a person will tell another person that they want to sleep with, 'let's just be friends', or 'we're just friends, nothing serious', etc. etc.- and it seems to me, that what that amounts to is people who want all of the benefits (such as sex) of a relationship, but none of the responsibility- then they want to wrap it all up and call it 'we're just friends'- I think that's the new way of covering up the old, 'Know what, I just wanna have sex with you, and I don't want anything more than that, but since I doubt that you'll feel respected if I tell you that, let's just call it something else!' and this goes for men as well as women, they both do it- Lol-
Twice_baked_taders 12/8/2007 11:31:08 PM
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It's the "I want a relationship" crap. The mighty limbo of commitment where confusion
and self satisfaction reign supreme.
Sings...Wheel it go round in circles. (dances round waving his arms in the air)
ScarlettButler 12/15/2007 10:53:42 PM
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well said Mostie!
UglyPoet 12/18/2007 2:55:34 PM
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Yes they do mostly. However i have had a friend with bennys before, we like each other physically but there was no romance there and we were happy with it. So for me its hard to say if friends first or friends after is really a choice. I would say its based on a per relationship basis, sometimes sex first sometimes sex later, it all depends on the two involved. However the one constant is being honest to one another, it makes things much easier and things tend to work out better.
WebcamMostie 12/19/2007 8:43:51 AM
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Well, I can't answer for mostie up there *smirk*- one of the downsides to what you're saying there, poet, is the fact that there is a big difference between the sexes- *duh, haha* - for men, there aren't a whole heck of a lot of them out there, although I'm sure there are some, who feel somewhat...degraded in a situation like that- I know I sure would- women for the most part can talk all they want about how 'oh I like it that way, sex with no strings attached'- but if the majority of them are honest with others and themselves, it really DOES make a person feel degraded, to be seen as, well...for lack of a better way to put it, a 'piece of meat'- and to know that the man they are sexually involved with sees them as nothing more than a sexual encounter, a means to an end, as it were- 'being honest with each other' is paramount, no doubt- but in my own opinion, one or the other in a situation like that isn't being totally honest-
That's not to say there aren't people out there like that who really ARE A-Ok with a situation like that- but gosh, I don't think I'd ever want to get serious with someone who was that way-
UglyPoet 12/19/2007 12:56:39 PM
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But thats it Webcam... every person is a individual, every person comes to terms and makes decsions based on their own thinking. I have meet woman that are more into just sex then relationships. I have also talked with guys that would not have sex without a relationship. To generalize male and female to any degree, is the problem we have in society. See the real crazy thing in this world, is the fact that if one person goes against what society deems proper, they are then shunned and called things like. Crazy, Nutter, Slut, Whore ect... all because they chose to do something the majority feels is wrong. While we all have our own moral deliemas to me there is no good reason for anyone to say their morals are better then another. Unless their morals interfear with another persons life or well being. If someone elses actions do not adversaly effect another then i could care less what they do. But to generalize and assume a majority of individuals tied to a gender or race for that matter would do this or do that, is really not right in my mind.
I to am the kind or person who can have a friend with no sex, and a friend with sex. I am also the kind of person who cares alot, and 99% of the time, i prefer sex with someone i am or may start a relationship with. This does not make me a bad person, or anything, its just how i see things as a individual. I prefer relationship sex over any other kind tho, its the best.
tck_beachbum 12/19/2007 1:46:10 PM
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Someone told me that "a stiff dick has no conscience".
Wha.. wha.. what's that mean? Mostie, can you tell me?
(And exactly what is 'con' science anyhow? Is that jail terminology?)
WebcamMostie 12/21/2007 7:21:57 AM
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tck, shuddit, you shirtless smartass! heh heh
crazykris 1/18/2008 3:55:27 AM
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OK, This subject has me writing. I have always believed friends before sex AND you will remain friends forever.(until....)
Most of my ex-lovers and I were aquainted as friends, became lovers, remained with a much deeper friendship. (except for the one that got shot in the back, He should have seen it comming!)
MisterMJ 1/19/2008 7:23:34 PM
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Hmmm...... A close female friend I have sex with. Hmmm.....
I know what I would call that.
A wife!
(prepares for the verbal beating from the less conservative members)
BuildingsGuy 1/27/2008 5:28:46 PM
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Hummmm friends before sex. I kind of agree with being friends first. I've only had one girlfiend that I was friends with first stab me in the back. I guess sometimes even friends don't always show everything. At least with a friend it is easier to be comfortable with and get closer with. Who knows, sometimes a friend is really the one we are all looking for and we just never noticed.
scorpio45 1/27/2008 6:44:07 PM
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True friends can say anything to one another without fear of judgement. If one could drop all there inhibitions with a stranger I suppose that might be fun, I am not sure I could. On the other hand if I were open with a friend and vice versa, sex would be all the better.
The more I think on it the harder it is to answer. For one, most men I believe will tell you that they size a woman up from the door whether they would sleep with her. However, I was having relations with someone and tested this out and asked openly, how long before she had decided she was going to sleep with me and she said after about 5 mins. I'm not sure that alot dont also do this.
So, I dont know just how much friendship one could possible have to overcome the first impression of wanting to have sex with someone.
NICEnEVIL 1/27/2008 7:51:49 PM
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I think someone up there called me a whore... hmmm
Michael_White 1/27/2008 8:18:43 PM
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who dares call a whore such a lovely thing?
Hope your bald hubby's treating you well
CaptainCorelli 1/27/2008 8:43:30 PM
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lol Evil, he/she appears to have paid for it with their life, for they are no longer with us.
bunkieboo 2/16/2008 4:41:13 PM
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Friends before sex? I heard something interesting on the radio one morning driving into work that kinda relates. What is the one thing you should know before having sex? The answer was, your partners mothers maiden name. I'll bet if that was true, there would be a lot less unwed pregnancies in the world. Unfortunately, I hate to admit that I'm lucky if I know my partners mothers name, much less her maiden name. Anyone else with me on that?
scorpio45 2/16/2008 5:46:03 PM
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**I think someone up there called me a whore... hmmm*** I musta missed it and honestly, I'd only be pissed off and lose it if I read it...you and I have been friends and youve been a great confidant someone I trust....
Anyway Jen, how you feeling these days? Hey My PC crashed so I need to downlowd MSN again an invite you again.... I guess your email is in my Hotmail account still...I dunno, I had to get a different PC and reload everything.
I dont even seem to be able to send any mail out of here, I'm still getting explorer updates and patches
***Mosite "And while I'm on the subject, I have something else to add to that- have you ever noticed that a lot of times, a person will tell another person that they want to sleep with, 'let's just be friends', or 'we're just friends, nothing serious', etc. etc.- and it seems to me, that what that amounts to is people who want all of the benefits (such as sex) of a relationship, but none of the responsibility- then they want to wrap it all up and call it 'we're just friends'***
I've experienced situations where people just purely want to have sex. There are as many opinions about it as people I think.
For instance, this issue you raise isnt exclusive to women....I had a fling of sorts when I was much yonuger with an older woman, just as soon as I intimated that we had "something" going on, she let it be known that she didnt want any of the responsibility of a relationship but we remained friendly.
Like I said before, the more I think on it the more complicated it becomes...for one thing...what is a friend? I know what sex is.
Now, there is one thing I would say as a man....that it seems for the most part, no matter how you think youll explain to a woman its just sex....they seem to 'have to' have some emotional thing with you to get it going.
Then there are the few, who dont really care, sex is just sex. I wouldnt call them a slut or whore per se. What I mean is this.....its easy lets say to call Paris a slut but when its someone I know, a female I really know in life, there are all the other elements to factor in. Just because she likes sex and gets it off wherever SHE chooses, I cant call her a slut. Not if I like her as a person. I've know a few women who make it plainly clear, they are just looking to get laid. Where I think the big difference is that traditionally Men have cared less about whether a woman thinks of them as friendly or whatever, as long as they can get those pants off. Having said that, times are changing. And this is JMO.
matt6 2/21/2008 6:42:37 PM
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I think i would be insulted if a woman wanted to have sex before getting to know me, sex is the end not the beginning of a sentence
Twice_baked_taders 2/22/2008 2:20:03 AM
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The major problem with this topics question is it places emphasis on sex as if friendship is required. There is a huge difference between sex and intimacy. Sex is meaningless and merits no attachment. Sex is not intimacy. It can be experienced that way. For this mere friendship will not suffice.
Yet many responses here confuse sex with intimacy. I find this disturbing. Anyone can have sex. It has become pretty meaningless in our society. It is recreation. Intimacy is less often experienced and I consider it a higher level communion between two people. It certainly is not recreation. For this a friendship must first be achieved. Intimacy is what any good lasting relationship is built on. Sex doesn't hold a candle to it though through intimacy sex becomes a whole different animal.
I will address this another way. Two people become friends and have sex. They part company. What significant meaning did the sex have that required friendship? Looking back does one announce they valued the sex or the friendship? My point again is that
Friendship and intimacy have value that sex can not hold a candle to.
Placing the focus on sex reduces the value of the friendship or the intimacy one worked so hard to achieve.
fireman08 2/22/2008 6:55:56 AM
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the old sang is got to test drive before u buy!!
fireman08 2/22/2008 6:55:59 AM
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the old sang is got to test drive before u buy!!
Twice_baked_taders 2/22/2008 10:15:38 AM
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"the old sang is got to test drive before u buy!!"
So having sex for a short time before you decide if the sex is good enough or not?
If not then what? Based on a short interval of unsatisfying sex with a person any other qualities they have are now rendered meaningless?
Like, This person was a great friend and we had so much in common but they could not satisfy my sexual needs. I have to move on.
Intimacy and friendship take a back seat.
I wonder what percentage of people will accept a person as a partner who is not a very good friend, has intimacy issues but, they can manage to orgasm with this person
quite famously.
What does "buy" mean?
WebcamMostie 2/24/2008 9:30:43 AM
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lol taders, that was good-
tck_beachbum 2/24/2008 9:41:40 AM
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I always seemed to be more comfortable around a chick after we had sex once.
It was like we could be ourselves without 'trying to get anything'.
I knew a chick once that said she liked to have sex early in a relationship just to see if the guy was gonna stick around afterwards, or was he just after the sex. As far as the guys who didn't stick around, she said if that's all he was after then we both got something we wanted without wasting a lot of time trying to impress each other first. She was the first girl I ever met who didn't feel that if a guy 'used her' for sex she had something 'taken' from her; she readily admitted that she liked sex and didn't mind 'using' each other.
A lot of girls seem to think that when they have sex they are losing a part of themselves.
biffled 2/24/2008 9:59:22 AM
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Interesting idea, tck, sex right from the get-go, but isn't that like buying a suspense novel where on page 2, the mystery is solved and the other 198 pages are (no pun intended) anti-climactic?
tck_beachbum 2/24/2008 10:09:43 AM
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With a relationship based TOTALLY on sex that might indeed be the case. I don't place sex as the pinnacle of a relationship.
Sex is just a part of a relationship, the other 23 hours each day are probably even more important.
In my case I am more comfortable after we have had sex at least once, that characteristic won't apply to everyone though. The relationship itself is based on the total package - personality, feelings, etc.
biffled 2/24/2008 10:28:03 AM
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On that, I guess we agree: I don't place sex as the pinnacle of a relationship either. I've been involved with several women where sex wasn't even involved because they had strong beliefs against pre-marital sex for religious or cultural reasons and the relationships were rewarding enough in other areas to last for several years each. But for me, I need some mystery, I need to develop some anticipation and some hunger-- when things happen too easy or too soon, it doesn't seem meaningful.
scorpio45 2/24/2008 10:51:57 AM
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Theres so many components to the sex drive that I dont think any one answer is correct for someone else. There's also peoples ability and desire to be social as in friendly.
In one situation I'm thinking I'd be very leery of anyone who openly brought up the notion of sex up front and then I know there have been people I knew I wanted and vice versa and it was all systems go! Once the idea of consentual sex is proposed and agreed to , it is not likely one cant stop the process.
I hate when they send messages of stop, no go go go hurry up now...wait stop!!!
tck_beachbum 2/24/2008 10:56:23 AM
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We all have some different 'tastes'... and that's what makes relationships GREAT.
Meaningful to me 'means' everything out in the open, nothing secret, know all, share all, give all. Some could say that I am insecure in 'needing' all of that. I could be considered superficial in possibly thinking that a girl is holding back sex as a reward for my continued 'preferred' behavior, maybe not allowing me to 'be myself' for fear of not attaining the reward(?).
But the bottom line is - to each their own.
TOXXXIC 2/24/2008 11:11:19 AM
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my juvenile son told me to "just hit it and quit"...........kids say the darndest things..... i will have to ask him if being a friend changes thing...............
tck_beachbum 2/24/2008 11:18:14 AM
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LOL, the 'hit it and quit it' philosophy. Usually invoked when the guy thinks she'll dump him if she gets to know him. His defense - quit first, so she can't. I used to apply that attitude in college.
Egos can be hilarious. I had a friend say that when he is with a chick he wants to do everything sexually possible. That way when he sees her after the relationship is over he'll know that no other guy can possibly do more with her then he has already done.
Twice_baked_taders 2/25/2008 7:29:39 PM
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Well Sex is great. It's just playing around at the important stuff as if sex mattered.
Pursuing orgasm honestly is great. I respect those who do. It's when it's mixed out of context with other more meaningful things like friendship and intimacy where things can get ugly. I've always said, The best part about hitting yourself in the head with a ball peen hammer.....is when yah stop, ;P
grynch 3/3/2008 4:50:21 PM
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I'm just coming out of a 12 year relationship with my once best friend..... I vote SEX!
Twice_baked_taders 3/3/2008 9:46:24 PM
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12 years and no sex? Wow.
jOjo07 3/4/2008 2:27:00 AM
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Friends before sex or no sex at all, because even if he/she is your friend doesn't mean they will stick around afterwards. Better to know a person a while before having sex, a long while.
Twice_baked_taders 3/5/2008 3:43:32 AM
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"Friends before sex or no sex at all, because even if he/she is your friend doesn't mean they will stick around afterwards."
If someone does not stick around what is the difference? What are they sticking around for? More sex?
charmingpeach 3/10/2008 12:35:01 PM
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well i was a 'FRIEND WITH BENEFITS' and its not what i thought it would be..we were friends for over 2 years and we had sex AFTER we got to know each other better and we continued to have sex but from the start he told me he didn't want to be anything more than that and i thought it was ok then but......my feelings got in the way of our friendship relationship and i wanted more than he could or was willing to give so i had to end that part of our friendship..we're still friends but its funny to me we don't talk near as much now as we did when the sex was involved..as wonderful as it was to be with him in every way i found that i couldn't just be his sexual friend anymore..i couldn't seperate my friendship from my love for him so i did what i felt was best for me and as much as i miss him i know it was the right decision...
AgentDoink 3/12/2008 2:29:53 AM
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how about we find out if they are carrying any STD's first...........thats always a good start..........!!!!!!!!!!!!
then you can work on being friends.......sex these days is like playing Russian Roulette......."click............click ......click.......BANG"
Twice_baked_taders 3/13/2008 8:16:30 PM
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"my feelings got in the way of our friendship relationship"
Yep, It's when we deny the feeling humans we are and try to function on an continuous impersonal level that things fall apart. Takes a lot of sex to take ones mind off the need to feel human. Sex is not an impersonal thing but it gets treated that way all the time. Eventually it falls short. It's not the tool for the job.
starryeyed_1 3/29/2008 5:45:38 PM
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Why bother to make friends, I think every one should just feel free to run around and screw anyone they run across and feel the least bit of physical attraction to, however fleeting that attraction may be. Then we could have a world full of disease, moral breakdown and 16 year old girls on talk shows with 20 men she thinks may be her baby's father that high five each other as one by one the tests come back saying they are NOT the father, and the welfare system could be completely overloaded, babies that are being raised by grandparents who are working well into their seventies AND raising their grandchildren because their social security is being used to support lazy *** ****buddies who are claiming disability when their only disability is laziness due to lack of common sense due to too much ******* partying! So the help is not there for people with valis problems who really need it.
OH That's right, this is already happening, sorry.
Why don't we all just get drunk and screw??????
Lindsey_Marie 4/22/2008 11:55:08 PM
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well... okay
RIHorseLady 4/29/2008 7:32:28 PM
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Chemistry is an elusive, little wood sprite. But once you catch it, it's a sensuos & exciting adventure.
362636 5/2/2008 7:32:02 AM
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Sex or friendship first? Maybe I'm misunderstanding the question. But......I don't have sex with "friends", just with "lovers. For me, friends and lovers are in separate categories.
dreamship2007 5/11/2008 2:14:02 AM
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Member since 5/10/2008 6:51:09 PM
should definatly know one another on some sordve friendly level first.
sex with strangers sounds dangerous but...........exciting.
there are friends and (friends with benefits).
never confuse the two
Twice_baked_taders 5/15/2008 8:56:29 AM
Posts: 994
Member since 4/6/2006
There are more people that screw each other over by playing at the "friends with benefits" fantasy. Most people, in fact, do not work that way. Toes get perpetually stepped on as people experience that awkward feeling afterward. That feeling is telling you something about yourself. Ignoring it and burying it is what ****'s people up.
Very few people can engage in the behavior and truthfully come out unscathed.
362636 5/15/2008 9:20:31 AM
Posts: 770
Member since 4/8/2008 6:01:23 AM
Bottom line: Friends don't FK friends?
Twice_baked_taders 5/16/2008 12:07:40 PM
Posts: 994
Member since 4/6/2006
Bottom line: Friends don't FK friends?
People can and do anything they want. Realizing and acknowledging the truth of the consequences is another thing all together.
362636 5/16/2008 1:03:21 PM
Posts: 770
Member since 4/8/2008 6:01:23 AM
Ways to lose friends:
(1) Lend her money
(2) Take her to bed
Hunter_Rep 5/17/2008 6:57:09 PM
Posts: 8840
Member since 11/27/1998
you are so wrong 36, me and my finance were just friends when we slept together, now we have two wonderful kids, so kiss my ass you uppity hermaphrodite
mantarydertheoriginal 5/17/2008 7:12:29 PM
Posts: 212
Member since 3/26/2008 8:36:06 PM
OK to paraphrase an old saying..... Can't we all just screw?.. or better yet Jiummy Buffets, .. Lets get drunk & screw....
Will I have sex with a female friend, yes. Because I know I can trust her & she has earned my respect, and at that point she has earned my heart.
TOXXXIC 5/17/2008 7:17:59 PM
Posts: 303
Member since 8/29/1999
Ways to lose friends:
(1) Lend her money
(2) Take her to bed
.......HAHAHAHAHAHAHA
wow i could continue this list forever
just shut your mouth b*tch, swallow that or spit it out, get your ghetto booty into the kitchen and bake me a pie...NOW
hahahahaha
bunkieboo 5/26/2008 12:08:16 AM
Posts: 1570
Member since 4/1/2002
Manta, It's "why don't we get drunk and screw?"
Doomgurl 7/11/2008 8:07:28 AM
Posts: 8
Member since 7/1/2008 8:37:30 AM
I dont believe you have to be friends with someone you have sex with - when you are involved in a RELATIONSHIP you have to be able to be friends with your lover - afterall, its difficult to maintain a relationship if you can't maintain a friendship with your love....
it helps of course, to GET ALONG with the person you are having sex with... but friendship is something that develops over a time.... - well, thats my 2c worth
enlightend_rogue 7/26/2008 4:56:37 AM
Posts: 31
Member since 7/9/2008 3:36:47 AM
I gotta say TBT you are right on. Once again I find myself in total agreement with nyou. Friends don't fck Friends.
With all due respect to Hunter _Rep there might have been more than just a friendship going on with you and your fiance before you had sex. There might have been real romantic feelings underlying the friendship and they grew into a sexual attraction.
But then I speak from my own experience and would not dare to speak for anyone else
Hunter_Rep 7/27/2008 10:03:47 PM
Posts: 8840
Member since 11/27/1998
actually rogue we were friends for 15 years, when we got together, origianlly it was just to have a kid, her ex husband had royally screwed her over, my ex, well was a bitch, but it didint take long after she gt pregnant for us to get together, now we are married and have two beutiful little girls.
we didnt have sex just for the fun of it, so it is a little diferent then just friends having sex, we had a purpose.
TONY6969 9/2/2008 2:07:43 PM
Posts: 25
Member since 7/6/2006
dame if i just want a **** go to the bar and get a fix but in real life now you must have some type of friendship b-4 you move on next level unless you both agree its a booty call !!
path_of_enlightenment 11/21/2008 2:43:40 PM
Posts: 1
Member since 11/21/2008 12:38:06 AM
Try marriage before sex -duh- life will be much better if your blessed as a result of obedience, as opposed to living under the curse of a lifestyle created in disobedience. LOL...path_of_enlightenment
MissGabi 12/8/2008 1:07:22 PM
Posts: 5
Member since 12/8/2008 10:28:27 AM
I would much rather live with a less than dynamite sex life and enjoy the rest of the 98% of the time I spend with a man because he is a "friend" who I respect and whose company I enjoy than have dynamite sex with a guy I think is a jack ass the rest of the time. Personally I have never met a man who I was attracted to on site but who repelled me with his personality that I would still have wanted to have sex with after having made the judgement he is not someone who I would want as a friend.
I have to laugh, it seems the gender split on this topic may have a lot to do with why we are here...The ladies by in large want a friend first then a lover. Men say friends are unsuitable lovers...interesting. Are we at cross purposes?
Xethian 12/8/2008 1:39:00 PM
Posts: 210
Member since 3/26/2000
168 hours per week. 2% of which is less than 4 hours. Minus 42 or more hours of sleep, 126 hours or less, 2% of which is less than 3 hours. Minus 42.5 or more hours of work and commuting, 83.5 hours or less, 2% of which is less than 2 hours. Minus shopping, hobbies, chores, etc, leaves, realistically 50 hours per week. 2% of which is one hour. If you only spend an hour a week having sex, then the other 98% of your time must be really enjoyable. when I'm with someone, it's gotta be at least 10% of what we do, and if she isn't enjoying it, then i'm not either. Guess what that means. I'm gonna work harder at figuring out what to do to make sure she enjoys it. That means more time having sex.
What was the question again? oh yeah... sex, when you can get it, with whom you can get it, just make sure it's safe, and the person you're having it with can handle the idea of casual sex. That there is the challenge... and why masturbation is so often a better choice.
Twice_baked_taders 12/13/2008 3:41:36 AM
Posts: 994
Member since 4/6/2006
"I have to laugh, it seems the gender split on this topic may have a lot to do with why we are here...The ladies by in large want a friend first then a lover. Men say friends are unsuitable lovers...interesting. Are we at cross purposes?"
Yes, without a doubt. Sex is sex. A friend is a friend.
A lover is another thing all together. It means you love your best friend and sex is the wonderful icing on that cake.
perspective is EVERYTHING!
I love my best friend, and the five cat's and 3 kids. Sex is rubbing each others feat on the couch! lol :P
BROWSE NOW
