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Kenshash... I am sorry about your loss. The advice I give is to take LOTS of time to sort through what it is that you want to do next and then start by allowing life to bring to you new friends that will come and GO during that process.

Since you will never find the same person again, accept it and keep your past as a part of who you are. It will be a new future and so try not to compare the past with the future but rather be accepting of the differences. I'm not sure how long you have been online but the biggest of CAUTION SIGNS go up to you. I could write a thesis on that topic!

For now, spend more time in the "real" world than online and go out as much as you can. Come online when the weather is bad or you have nothing better to do with your time. It's an escape but don't live in the escape mode. Be exactly who you are and get ready to use the delete button a lot - this is not the place to feel you need to be nice to everyone that sends you a note. If you get an email that sounds crazy... it is! Good luck kenshash.

The best thing is to go out and live, Have fun. Do everything you wanted to do but couldnt as long as you have money too, Remeber life is very short

I am 43 and recently widowed. I spent 3 months in bed and now I am trying to get out into that real world. It is damn hard, but worth it. I have been spending way to much time on line and I have been duped. It is better to see them first in my opinion. Take care of yourself first, then worry about finding a mate.